Incredible Sex (52 Brilliant Little Ideas) (9 page)

You could also try wearing each other’s underwear to work. For women, wearing a loose pair of boxers under a skirt lets the air circulate where it normally never gets to go and makes you feel more open in every sense of the word. For men, the feeling of constriction that comes from tight feminine panties under your business suit can be arousing – as well as all the other associations and images that will flash through your mind throughout the day.

Take this one step further and play around with cross-dressing. Wear each other’s clothes in bed. You’ll hate it or love it, but if you love it, you might be surprised at how much you love it. For men especially, breaking one of the last great heterosexual taboos (dressing as a woman) is a hugely liberating experience. Remember, no one knows but you two.

Need more inspiration? Go to a naturist beach together, make a porn short, photograph each other nude or have sex on the steps of your local library (make it a quickie!) – risky, but it will make you smile every time you drive to the supermarket! And, of course, don’t break the first rule of secrets. You don’t tell. Ever.

34.
   
Classic positions

How do you get on with those old favourites? You know – the ones you’re sure even your mum knows.

Couples who experiment generally have a sexual repertoire that includes two or three basic positions, and these are likely to be the missionary, woman on top and doggy style. It’s often easier to begin sex play with missionary because with the woman prone on her back and the man’s weight supported on his knees, it’s an easier vantage point to actually insert the penis. If the man lies flat down on his partner, her pelvic movements are restricted, so he should rest more weight on his knees and lift his pelvis up so that she can rub her clitoris against his pelvic bone. For deeper penetration she can lift her legs up as far as possible, all the way to putting them over his shoulders. The higher you can get them back, the deeper the penetration.

For other variations interlock your legs, or twist them around his back to squeeze him tighter. An alternative is to close your legs to make the vaginal passage narrower. As with all sexual positions, it’s not the posture but the way that you move to the strokes that creates the biggest difference in sensation. From this position, it’s also easy to roll into sex sideways or (if you’re adventurous) you can do a complete body roll so that you are in the next popular position, woman on top.

Here’s an idea for you…

Get into the missionary position then try moving the position of your knees/legs. Can you bring them forward, lift them onto his legs? Changing your leverage makes all the difference. If he supports himself on his knees you can raise your lower body and, ironically, this position puts you in control.

Both men and women generally find it easier to come when they’re on top. You can lie down over your partner, balancing your weight forward onto your clitoris and you’re in an ideal position to use your knees to rock, thrust or push your way to orgasm. You can also sit up (note that you get better penetration if you do this sitting on a chair with no arms so your legs can use the floor for leverage) and just choose to rock back and forth. A variation is to lean back more, still straddling his penis so your clitoris is exposed, making it dead easy for you to play with it and giving him a ringside seat. Another trick is for you to sit the other way facing his feet reverse ‘cowgirl’ style, which gives you a different feeling again and is ideal for men who worship an exposed
derrière
in action.

Doggy style or rear entry feels more animalistic. The emphasis is on penetration (it’ll make his penis seem bigger) although he can use a deft hand to stimulate your clitoris and breasts at the same time.

This one makes it easier for him to come, so often it’s the explosive finale. You can either lie prone on your stomach or on all fours with the weight on your knees. His legs can be inside or outside yours; an alternative is to do it on your sides lying down.

Revisit these classic positions and put a little more oomph into them. It’s easy and you won’t need to look at a diagram whilst you’re at it!

35.
   
Blooming sexy

Some women see being pregnant as an excuse not to have sex. Madness. Sex when you’re pregnant is brilliant.

So, sex and the pregnant woman. The first thing to say is that it is perfectly safe for you and your baby. Swinging from chandeliers as you go into the third trimester may not be advisable, but most things are admissible. It is also a good excuse to experiment with some new positions.

There are several positions for pregnant women that are both comfortable and safe. So if you haven’t already tried them, go for it.

Here’s an idea for you

Rather than hiding your bump, accentuate it. A very chic way to do this is to wrap a brightly coloured scarf around it and tie it in a knot to one side. Or wear a short T-shirt and low-cut maternity jeans or a sarong (obviously only when it’s warm outside!). Try a lovely slinky (stretchy) dress that hugs the contours of your bump, but make sure it’s comfortable, it’s very hard to feel sexy when you’re focusing on trying to breathe.

   Position one: Woman on top. Lower yourself onto your partner, either facing him or facing his feet. Many women find their nipples are incredibly sensitive when they’re pregnant, so if you’re facing him, make sure he kisses them with his mouth.

   Position two: The classic missionary position obviously doesn’t work with a bump, but this one does. You lie on your back, knees drawn back with your feet resting on your partner’s chest, or with your legs straight up and resting against your partner (a good hamstring stretch this one). Your partner kneels between your legs to enter you, so there is no weight on your stomach. You might find it more comfortable with a pillow under your bottom.

   Position three: Side by side. You and your partner lie side by side, facing each other. You can drape your leg over your partner’s body. This is not really very practical in the third trimester as the bump gets in the way.

   Position four: Spooning, on the other hand, works throughout. You lie on your side, in a curled position. Your partner lies behind you and enters you from behind. Penetration is shallow, so this can be a comfortable position during late pregnancy.

   Position five: From behind. You are on all fours on the bed (or wherever), leaning down onto pillows with your partner kneeling and entering you from behind. Or, try bending over the bed (supported by pillows) with your partner standing and entering from behind. This is what is medically termed a maximum penetration position, so do tell your partner if it gets painful.

   Position six: Sitting. In this position, you straddle your partner while he is sitting on a sturdy, comfortable chair or on the edge of the bed. You can also sit in an armchair, upright or leaning back slightly, with your legs around your partner, who is kneeling in front of you.

And you thought being pregnant signalled the end of your sex life.

36.
   
Paying for it 1

Slut sex can be a turn-on for both of you.

Both sexes can get a huge kick out of acting out prostitution fantasies. They help us to enjoy the freedom of imagining that we’re

having no-holds-barred, no-strings-attached sex. The ‘client’ gets the thrill of the clean transaction, of the freedom of asking for what he wants, of control, of being in charge. The ‘whore’ gets the visible proof that he values what she does in bed.

Here’s an idea for you…