Summoned (The Brazil Werewolf Series) (11 page)

Chapter Twelve

Side affects

             
We were quiet in the limousine on the way home.  Tears burned my eyes.  I could feel his anger as he sat beside me rigid and cool.  There was no mistaking the hate he harbored.  I could feel it.  I could feel it all. 

             
My heart clenched because I knew he blamed me.  It was my fault because I wasn’t careful and it had cost us both our freedom.  I swallowed over the bitter disappointment.  In a few hours, every dream I had died.  I had known better than to hope.   

             
“Are you still hurting?”  He asked, causing me to jump.  I hadn’t expected him to speak to me.   

             
I looked at him and he frowned, “No, I’m not hurting,” I whispered as another tear fell down my cheek.  

             
“Don’t cry,” he said, finally taking my hand.  I could see the pain and guilt in his eyes as he looked at me, “I’m so sorry.”

             
I frowned, confused, “About what?”

             
His face fell, “I should have been there,” he said, swallowing hard, “I should have been able to protect you.”

             
I blinked as I took in his words.  Maybe I had misunderstood his anger.  Maybe it wasn’t directed at me.  Maybe it was directed at himself.

             
“This isn’t your fault,” I said as my heart clenched.  Anger slammed into me, “This is my father’s fault and Eli’s fault but it’s not yours.”

             
He shook his head as I spoke, “I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

             
“You can’t be with me all of the time,” I said as I reached forward and caressed his face.  He placed his hand over mine and kissed it. 

             
“I promise you won’t be hurt again,” he said, pulling me close to him, “I’ll know when you are hurt now.  That‘s the good thing about the bond.”

             
I bit my bottom lip as I peered up at him, “Thank you for saving me.”

             
“You’re not mad?” He asked, sounding tortured. 

             
“No,” I whispered and sighed, “I wish we would have been able to choose the bond ourselves but I’m not mad.  I understand why you did it.”

             
He sighed heavily as he looked at me.  His eyes darkened, “Do you realize what it means?”

             
I shook my head, “Only that we’ll know each others feelings,” I said, frowning, “We will also die if we are separated from each other or if one of us dies, the other will too.”

             
He looked at me pained as he shifted.  His eyes darkened further, “That’s not all,” he said, swallowing.

             
I frowned, “What else does the blood bond mean?” 

             
He shifted, uncomfortable, “It means that it will be very hard for us not to want to….mate.”

             
My mouth dropped open and I blushed, “Oh.”

             
I blinked as I tried to take in everything that he said.  I forced myself to breath and then, raised my eyes to meet his.  He pressed his lips together as worry clouded his features. 

             
“I swear I won’t force you to do anything,” he said, swallowing, “But it will be very hard for you to resist it too.”

             
I looked up at him with my eyes wide, “I’ll try my best,” I whispered as I remembered all of the times my father called for me and I tried to resist but failed, “Just don’t hate me if I can’t.”

             
He gave me a sad smile, “I won’t,” he said, “As long as you promise not to hate me either.”

             
I nodded, “I promise.”

             
The limousine stopped in front of a brand new motor home.  I looked out of the window and sighed.  This would be my home for the rest of my life.  Suddenly, something I had looked forward to seemed dark and dismal.  Marco opened the door and helped me out of the limousine. 

             
We stood in front of our home as he finally gave a genuine smile, “I hope you like it,” he said as we walked to the door.  He took a key and unlocked the door before stepping back down to stand beside me.

             
“Are you ready to go inside?”  He asked and I nodded.  In one quick move, he picked me up, causing me to squeal in surprise.

             
“What are you doing?” I asked, looking into his smiling face. 

             
“I’m not letting Eli or your father ruin everything,” he said, kissing my temple, “I’m carrying you across the threshold.” 

             
A moment later, he stepped up the little metal steps and over the threshold of our home. 

**********

              I gasped as I looked around the home in awe.  We stood inside the living room which was bright with a beige couch lining the wall and chairs of the same color to either side.  The passenger and driver’s seat were turned toward the living area to give extra seating.  There was a shelf with a flat screened television upon it positioned on the opposite wall from the couch. 

             
I looked to the left and found the dining room table with cushioned seats place around it.  To the left of that was the kitchen made of shining Steele and light colored wood.  There was a new dishwasher, stove and refrigerator.  Beside the kitchen was an open cupboard which held a stackable washer and dryer. 

             
“What do you think?” Marco asked and I turned to find that he was studying me.  He bit his bottom lip nervously as he waited for my answer. 

             
“It’s beautiful,” I said in awe, “Did you choose it?”

             
He smiled suddenly proud, “The day after you arrived,” he said and then, shifted meeting my eyes, “Would you like to see the rest?”

             
I grinned suddenly relaxed, “Yes,” I said, smiling widely. 

             
He grabbed my hand and pulled me through a door into a room where bunk beds were housed.  The small room held a dresser which sat across from the beds.  There was a door beside it and another one between the beds and the dresser.  He went to the door beside the dresser and opened it.  He turned on the light illuminating a bathroom with a large shower, sink and toilet.   Towels were rolled and placed in a wicker basket beside the shower. 

             
“Everything is ready when you want to get washed up,” he said, staring at my blood soaked bodice.  I blinked as I tried not to think of my ruined wedding dress. 

             
“Thank you,” I said, forcing a smile. 

             
“There’s only one more room,” he said, going to the other door.  He opened it and pushed a button, turning on the light.  The bedroom held a King size bed covered in light blue silk.  Pillows of white and blue decorated the bed.  Mirrored doors led to a small closet.  There were bedside tables on either side of the bed and a dresser of light wood on the far wall. 

             
“All of your clothes are here,” he said, opening the closet before pointing at the dresser, “My mom brought them over and put them away.”

             
I nodded as I stood near the bed, trembling, “Remind me to thank her,” I said, in almost a whisper. 

             
I could feel him step behind me, “I told you I wouldn’t force anything on you,” he whispered, “If you don’t want to take the chance of either of us giving into the bond, I can sleep on one of the bunk beds.”

             
I shook my head, “No,” I said, taking a deep breath, “You can sleep in here. I won’t spend our married life sleeping in separate beds.”

             
He gently turned me around to face him.  His eyes were dark and pleading, “Are you sure?” He asked as he searched my face. 

             
“I am,” I said, straightening my spine. 

             
“Okay,” he said before caressing my cheek and kissing me briefly. 

             
“I’ll let you get a shower and get dressed for bed then,” he said, stiffly and turned. 

             
I winced as I thought of the corset ties, “I can’t undo the ties on my dress by myself,” I said, seeing his face darken even more. 

             
He nodded as I turned around, holding the bodice of my dress steady.  He loosened the ties slowly.  His fingers barely touched my skin but suddenly my heart began to beat faster and faster.  I could feel his breath fan across my bare skin as my stomach flipped pleasantly.  I closed my eyes trying to push away the need that was rushing through me.  I could feel his breath getting closer and closer to my skin and then, his lips were on my neck, tasting the tender skin there. 

             
I groaned and leaned back against him as his teeth scraped against my skin causing me to tremble.  I heard him suck breath through his teeth as he turned me around so quickly that I released the dress, allowing it to fall in a pool around me. 

             
He pulled me to him as his mouth met mine in a bruising kiss.  His tongue traced my lips.  A moan escaped me as his tongue plunged into my mouth.  He closed his eyes and groaned as if in pain and then, pulled away from me still breathing hard. 

             
I looked down, finding that I was standing in only my underwear.  I trembled with need and I had to fight the urge to go to him and beg that he finish what he started.  He glanced up at me and then, closed his eyes again. 

             
“I’m sorry,” he said, breathless, “I didn’t mean to.”

             
“It’s not your fault,” I said, straightening as I forced breath through my lungs.

             
“I’ll sleep in the other bed,” he whispered and I shook my head at the offer again.

             
“No,” I said, raising my chin, “You won’t.  You will sleep in here with me.  I won’t let my father win and I’m not going to let Eli win either.”

             
“Lilly, I don’t know if I can stop myself,” he said, frowning.

             
“Neither do I,” I said, meeting his eyes, “But I wouldn’t hate you if you did and I hope you wouldn’t hate me.”

             
He nodded, “But I will still try,” he said, giving me a sad smile, “I don’t want to take your purity just based on a forced bond.”

             
My heart melted a little, “I know.”

             
I sighed and looked at the dresser, “I think I will shower first if that‘s okay,” I said, shifting again, “I still have blood on me.”

             
“You don’t have to ask permission to take a shower, Lilly,” he said and then, went to the dresser drawer and pulled out a long white gown with an emperor waist line.  It had thin white straps which left my arms bare. 

             
“Your things are in these three drawers,” he said, as he handed me the gown and pointed at the drawers with his other hand. 

             
“Thank you,” I said as he turned to leave. 

             
He stopped at the doorway, “I hope you know that I wasn‘t trying to force the blood bond on you.”

             
I nodded as I felt my chest constrict, “I know that.” 

             
He nodded as his eyes swept over me again.  Then, he was gone, leaving me lonelier than I had ever been.

Chapter Thirteen

The Dance

              I shouldn‘t have dreamed.  I shouldn’t have hoped.  I knew better.  It only led to heartache and pain.  Since our wedding night that is exactly what I felt…heartache and pain. 

             
Marco and I had not given into the blood bond.  However, the only reason was because he was avoiding me.  We shared the same bed every night but he only arrived home long after I had gone to sleep.  A few times, I was sure that he had caressed my cheek but when I woke, he was either sound asleep beside me or not home at all.

             
It had been two weeks since I had really spoken to him.  It had been three weeks since the wedding.  I really didn’t expect for any of it to change as I dressed for a bonfire celebration.  Aurora would be revealing the sex of the baby and I was expected to be there even though I didn‘t feel like celebrating. 

             
I was standing in front of the mirrored closet doors, looking at my reflection.  I wore a black beanie with a matching straight belted coat over my white sweater dress which was long enough to touch my knee high black boots.  My hair flowed down around my face and down my shoulders in soft waves.  I frowned at the reflection, scrutinizing every flaw.                  

             
“You look beautiful,” Marco said behind me, causing me to jump. 

             
I turned to find him, leaning with his shoulder against the door frame.  He was studying me intently.

             
“You’re home,” I said, shifting beneath his gaze. 

             
“I thought I would take you to the bonfire,” he said, meeting my eyes.  Uncertainty rested in his face, “Unless you don’t want me to.”

             
“I do want you to,” I whispered, confused.  He had spent so much time avoiding me that I had convinced myself he could not stand to be in my presence.  Though my heart had been broken, I was beginning to accept that he would avoid me for the rest of our marriage.              

             
I gazed at him for a moment before turning back to the mirror.  Again, I studied my face, seeing every flaw before turning back to face him. 

             
“Lilly,” he whispered brokenly but he didn’t say anything else.  Instead, he reached his hand out to me.  I swallowed as I looked at his hand for a long moment before placing my hand in his.  I jumped as an electrical awareness slammed through me. For a moment, I wondered if he felt it too and then, I rolled my eyes.  Of course he did, the bond had caused it.

             
We were silent as we made our way to the bonfire, which was blazing high into the night sky.  The heat coming from it caused the whole field to be warm.  Aurora saw me and came to me, giving me a tight hug.  Her face was alight with joy.

             
“Lilly, I’m so glad you are here,” she said, smiling and then, looked at Marco and frowned, “Hello, Marco.”

             
He smiled, but it did not reach his eyes.  He released my hand to hug her and then, looked around, “Where is Andre?”

             
She frowned again, “He’s by the bonfire talking to Gavriel.”

             
He nodded before looking at me, “I think I’ll go talk to him.”

             
I nodded and he walked away without looking back.  I swallowed over the lump in my throat. 

             
“I’m guessing married life hasn’t been that great for you lately,” Aurora said when he was far enough away that he couldn’t hear. 

             
I shrugged trying to seem as if didn‘t matter, “The bond has been stressful,” I whispered, “I think he regrets it.”

             
Aurora shook her head and her eyes filled with sympathy, “I don’t think that’s true.”

             
I shrugged again and she sighed before giving me a sweet smile, “Maybe I can cheer you up.”

             
I looked at her raising my brow not believing it was possible to cheer me up.  Still, I asked, “How’s that?”

             
“I’ll tell you the secret first,” she said, rubbing her stomach as she leaned forward and whispered, “We’re having a girl.”

             
My eyes filled with tears though I didn‘t know if they were from happiness or want.  I would never have my own children.  Still, I would not steal Aurora’s happiness.               “Congratulations,” I said, rubbing her belly briefly before offering her a sad smile.

             
“That’s not the only thing I want to tell you,” she said, grinning. 

             
“What else?”  I asked, looking up into her bright eyes. 

             
“Well, her first name will be Ruby which Sophia picked out and we liked it,” she said, smiling, “But her middle name is your middle name.”

             
My eyes widened as true happiness filled me.   A tear fell down my cheek, “Ruby Nadine,” I whispered and Aurora nodded as I cried, “It’s beautiful.”

             
She hugged me again, “Now, don’t cry,” she said, laughing, “We are supposed to be celebrating, “

             
“You’re right,” I said, raising my chin and walking with her toward the bonfire, “I do need to celebrate.      

             
As if on cue, we met Mirella who was carrying two cups.  She handed one to me and gave me a large smile, “its strawberry wine,” she said when I looked down at it confused. 

             
“I’ve never drank wine,” I said, frowning. 

             
Aurora laughed, “Andre is right,” she said, nudging Mirella in the ribs, “You are a bad influence.”

             
Mirella stuck out her tongue, “Drink it,” she said, looking at me and then, looked at Aurora, “And I am not a bad influence.”

             
I took a deep breath and took my first drink, enjoying the sweet, bubbly taste as it flowed down my throat.  Mirella grabbed my hand, grinning, “Come dance with me.”

             
I nodded as she pulled me away from Aurora, who was laughing, “Be careful,” she called, “The wine can get you into wicked trouble.  Mirella will get you into even more.”

             
I grinned back at her.  After Marco’s avoidance of me, I could use some wicked trouble. 

**********

              I was laughing as I danced with Mirella and Aurora.  My head had begun to swim as I took another drink of the wine.  I laughed as I sat down on one of the benches. 

             
“I haven’t seen that smile since your wedding,” Mirella said, causing it to fade. 

             
“Mirella,” Aurora scolded. 

             
Mirella flushed, “I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head as she looked at the crowd, “I wasn’t thinking.” 

             
“No, you weren’t,” Aurora said, shaking her head. She looked up at me, “Still, it is nice to see you smile.” 

             
I nodded, seeing Andre walking toward Aurora.  A man with long black hair and silver eyes walked beside him.  I frowned as I tried to remember his name.  Slowly, it came to me…Garridan. 

             
He smiled when he saw Aurora, “I just wanted to say congratulations on your little girl,” he said, hugging her briefly. 

             
“Thank you,” Aurora said, grinning up at him as Mirella hugged him and began to talk animatedly with him. 

             
Andre stood beside Aurora, putting his arm around her.  He kissed her temple and my heart clenched.  My marriage would never be like that.  I sighed as my head began to swim even more. 

             
Aurora looked at me, concerned, “Are you okay?” She asked, frowning. 

             
I shook my head, “I think I want to go home,” I said, forcing a smile, “I’m feeling a little dizzy.”

     
              She nodded, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

             
“Yes, you will,” I said, standing unsteadily to go in search of Marco. 

             
“Do you want me to go with you?” She asked, frowning.

             
I looked at Andre and then, looked back at her, “No, I can find him on my own.  I’ll stay within the crowd.”

             
“Okay,” she said, still worried. 

             
“I promise I will be where I can be seen,” I said to reassure her.

             
Finally, she smiled, appeased, “Okay.” 

             
I walked away from her around the bonfire until I saw Sophia.  I walked closer, finding that Marco was speaking to her.  I stopped when I heard the anger in his voice. 

             
“I didn’t want this mother,” he said, through his teeth, “I didn’t want the bond.”

             
My heart sank as tears burned my eyes.  I knew that he didn’t want it.  I had not asked for it either but the anger in his voice was undeniable. 

             
“She’s your wife,” Sophia said, looking at her son with her eyes narrowed. 

             
“She’s my wife by arranged marriage,” he said, angrily, “That was hard enough.  Now, we have the nuisance of this bond.”

             
I closed my eyes and stifled the sob that threatened to break from my throat.  Still, they turned seeing me.  Marco’s eyes widened and Sophia looked at me in absolute panic.  Tears fell down my cheeks as my heart shattered into a million pieces. 

             
“I’m sorry, Sophia,” I whispered, “It seems that I am not the blessing you had hoped for.”

             
Then, I turned and walked away.  I could hear him call after me but it was too late.  I didn’t want to speak to him.  I didn’t want to be in his presence.  I just wanted to leave.  As soon as I was past the field, I ran, hearing my breath in my ears.  I looked at the home we had shared for such a short time and swallowed over the pain that rose to choke me.  My mother was right.  I was unlovable…unwanted. 

             
I walked into the motor home, feeling my heart break again as I saw all of my dreams vanish.  The air left my lungs as absolute desolation took me.  Only the turn of the knob, caused me to move.  I ran back to the bedroom, locking the door behind me. 

             
Tears burned my eyes as I heard him try to turn the knob, “Lilly,” he said on the other side of the door, “Please let me talk to you.”

             
I didn’t answer him.  Instead, I pulled open the closet door and pulled out the luggage within.  I began to grab the clothes from the dresser drawers and put them into the suitcases.  I didn’t know where I would go.  I just knew that I couldn’t live there with him. 

             
He began to pound on the door, “Lilly, open the door,” he said, sounding more and more angry. 

             
I zipped the zipper on the first suitcase of the luggage and grabbed the second placing it on the bed, “Lilly, if you don’t open the door, I’ll break it down.” 

             
I stiffened and looked toward the door, narrowing my eyes.  Fine.  If he wanted to see what I was doing, he could.   

             
I pressed my lips together as I walked to the door and unlocked it before returning to packing my clothes.  I heard him open the door and then, inhale sharply.  I could feel his panic. 

             
“You’re not leaving,” he whispered, as I folded a dress. 

             
“Yes, I am,” I said, feeling the anger and hurt bubble up within my chest, “I don’t know why you are even here.  I’ve heard what you really think.  You should be happy the nuisance in your life is gone.”

             
He stepped closer to me.  His eyes following every movement I made, “I didn’t call you a nuisance,” he said, frowning, “I called the bond a nuisance.  If I’m around you, I don’t know what feelings are real or fake anymore.  I want to know what’s real.”

             
Tears rested in my eyes as I looked at him, “Well, you should know your feelings by now,” I said with my nostrils flaring, “You haven’t been here for two weeks.”

             
A muscle beneath his eye twitched but he didn’t say anything.   I shook my head and began to pack again.  He ripped the shirt I was folding from my hand.